The Cost of Following Jesus: Why Surrender Brings More

Hey, sweet friends! Last week we talked about finding our footing in that messy, uncomfortable space between the life that no longer fits and the life God is calling us into. This week, we're diving a little deeper into a truth that every single disciple eventually encounters: following Jesus always costs something. Maybe it’s a relationship, maybe it’s approval, a long-held dream, or just our comfortable routines. But here’s the beautiful part: whatever He asks us to surrender is never greater than what He promises to give.

The Cost of a Meaningful "Yes"

Have you ever noticed that almost every meaningful “yes” in life requires a “no” somewhere else? Saying “yes” to marriage means saying “no” to every other person. Saying “yes” to parenthood means saying “no” to a certain kind of freedom. Saying “yes” to one calling means saying “no” to countless other opportunities. Every meaningful "yes" carries a cost, and sometimes we forget that's true of following Jesus, too. It’s not because He’s trying to make our lives harder, but because following Him has never simply been about adding Him into the life we already have planned. It’s about allowing Him to reorder our entire lives around Himself. And that's where it can get really uncomfortable, because we all love the idea of following Jesus until it costs us something.

When those moments come, and God asks us to lay something down—a relationship, approval, comfort, a dream, or even just the version of our life we thought we'd have—the quiet question many of us wrestle with is, "If you love me, why does obedience sometimes cost so much?" That's an honest question, and we shouldn't be afraid to ask it. Because if we're willing to wrestle with it, we’ll discover something incredibly beautiful about the heart of God.

Why Does God Ask Us to Let Go?

The core question we’re wrestling with today is: why does following Jesus involve surrender at all? One important thing to remember is that Jesus never hid the cost of discipleship. He invited people honestly into it, always very open about the cost. In Luke 14:25-33, He talked about counting the cost of following Him—not to discourage, but to invite people into wholehearted devotion. When there's a high cost to something, we're often more committed to it.

Luke 14:25-33

Every single disciple left something behind. Peter walked away from his life as a fisherman, Matthew from his life as a tax collector, and Paul from his status and reputation. They left what was familiar, what was comfortable. None of these things were necessarily sinful! Sometimes, God asks us to surrender good things because He's calling us to something better. We often assume obedience shouldn't cost us anything, maybe because of a false gospel that promises a life without challenge. But the heart of the Father isn't about giving us everything we want; it's about drawing us into deeper intimacy with Him.

Surrender Builds Trust and Reveals Our Hearts

Friend, surrender doesn't always feel good, and it doesn't always yield an immediate result we can see. Surrender is simply obedience. It’s giving Him our "yes" even when we don't have all the answers. This is hard to do, but it builds trust, and that’s what He truly desires. Following Jesus has always involved surrender, not because He delights in taking things away, but because surrender is how He teaches us to trust Him.

If God is good, why doesn't He just let us keep everything? This question speaks to our heart posture. Sometimes, the good things we hold dear can become idols in our lives. When He asks us to lay something down, He isn’t just after behavioral change; He’s after our hearts. Our "yes" or our "no" to surrender reveals where we've placed our trust. The things that are hardest for us to let go of often show us where our dependence truly lies. It might not be that the thing itself is bad—like a coaching practice that helps women, or a dream of motherhood—but that He wants us to become solely dependent on Him.

Philippians 3:7-8 But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Jesus Christ my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish in order that I may gain Christ.

This scripture shows us that Paul wasn't captivated by what he had lost; he was more captivated by who he found. When we choose to surrender, even when it’s hard or humbling, it becomes our best "yes" because He meets us in such a beautiful way. We discover that Jesus truly is enough. He's not trying to make our lives smaller; He's inviting us into something deeper.

The Character of God: Our Anchor in Surrender

We can sometimes focus on what we’re leaving behind instead of who we’re gaining. But remember this precious truth:

Psalm 84:11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.

When God asks us for our "yes," for our pause, for our trust, we can remember that He doesn't withhold anything good from us when we walk in obedience to Him. It all boils down to His character. When we understand who the Father is and who we are because of Him, it's so much easier to release what He's asking us to. When you open one hand to give something to Him, you're also opening the other hand for Him to fill it. And what He gives is always tenfold better than we could ever hope or imagine.

His invitation to let go is an invitation of love. He always meets our gift to Him with a greater gift of love. He is trustworthy because He is worthy.

Reflection Questions:

1. What "meaningful yes" have you said in your life that required a "no" to something else? How does that help you understand the cost of following Jesus?
2. Have you ever found yourself quietly wrestling with the question, "If you love me, why does obedience sometimes cost so much?" What truths about God's character help you answer that question?
3. Is there anything "good" in your life that God might be inviting you to loosen your grip on, not because it's bad, but because He's calling you to something better or deeper?
4. How can focusing on the character of God (His trustworthiness, His love, His sovereignty) help you in moments when surrender feels challenging?
5. Instead of asking, "What is this going to cost me?", try asking, "Jesus, will you help me trust you enough to let go?" What feelings or thoughts arise when you reframe the question this way?